"Alla ma3ak 3abdalla" said Tante Mountaha yesterday right before they closed the box again and took her husband's body to his last place. I am sure that God is indeed with this wonderful loving caring man. A lot of people are going to miss his smiling eyes and his fresh and young spirit. I already miss him myself. At least I got to see him before he left this world and I had the chance to tell him that I am back for good to marry and live in Lebanon and god his blessings.To his memory, I am posting again what I posted earlier... Goodbye Ammo Abdallah!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Abdallah Tohmé is a personality I grew to know and love in Zouk Mikael.Abdallah Tohmé, husband of Mountaha and father to Najwa, Father Joseph, and Tony, is a handyman and a mechanic by profession. After his retirement, he worked the Nawl (weaving) and the Marsaben (marzipan), two of Zouk's famous handicrafts; and all through his life he had the hobby and talent of writing and saying Lebanese poems (asayid).Abdallah Tohmé cared for me like one of his own children. As I wasn't dating any of his sons yet was always around his children, he gave me the nickname ofseasonal-daughter-in-law(kennetna el mawsamiyyi). His smile was filled with a fatherly love and an affection that I have not seen in any other smile. He always had time to chat and hang out and have fun with me and his children. I dont remember ever seeing him angry or grumpy.Abdalla Tohmé has been suffering from Multiple Myeloma for 3 years now and with God's will, he is still hanging on to life. I saw him last when I visited Lebanon in 2006 and I had no idea about his medical state. I saw a weak man, size less than half of the man I used to know, barely breathing and moving. Yet, when he saw me, his eyes were the same glowing loving eyes and his words, the few he could say were to tell me that "lots of people came to the Tohmé's lives and home, and that only very few left a trace, and that I was one of these very few people who will never be forgotten in this house".On Thursday July 5/07, Abdallah Tohmé's family and friends are commemorating his poems in a book. Along with over 400 people of his closest friends and fans, Abdallah Tohmé's life is being celebrated.This is a poem that Ammo Abdallah sent me in a voice letter (cassette) back in 1988, a year after I left for Canada. It's a poem he had written in his first letter to his family when he was working in Kuwait in 1956.????? ??????? ????? ???? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ?????? ????? ???? ?? ???????? ?? ??? ?????????? ??? ?????? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ????? ?????????? ????? ????????????? ????? ?????? ????? ?????? ?????????? ?? ???? ???????????? ??????? ????????? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ??????????? ???? ?? ???????? ?????? ???? ?????????? ?????? ????????? ???? ???? ???????????? ??? ????????? ???? ?? ???? ??? ??? ????? ??? ?????????? ???? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ??????????? ??????? ????? ???? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ?????? ????? ???? ?? ?????????? ?????? ????? ??? ??????? ????????? ????? ??? ??????? ??? ????? ??? ?????????? ??????? ???? ??? ???? ????? ???????? ??? ???? ???? ???? ?????? ??????????? ??????? ????? ???? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ?????? ????? ???? ?? ???????? ???? ?????????? ????? ????????????? ????? ??????????????? ????????? ???? ???? ????????? ????? ?????????? ???? ??????????????? ???????????? ??????? ????????? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ??????????? ???? ?? ?????? ????? ?? ???? ?????? ?????? ??????????? ?? ????? ??????? ??????? ???????????? ???? ?? ????????? ????? ??????????? ???? ???????? ?????? ???????????? ??????? ????? ???? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ?????? ????? ???? ?? ?????????????? ??????? ????? ????? ????????? ???? ??????? ????? ??????? ????????????? ??????? ????? ?? ???? ??????? ?????? ?????? ?????? ????? ??? ???? ????? ???????????? ??????? ????? ???? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??? ?????? ????? ???? ?? ??????????? ???? - ????? ????? ?? ??? ????? ??? ????? ??? 1956 ?? ??????
What better number to start posting about my new life than100!So let me start from the very beginning.Thursday February 28, 2008, Lufthansa left Toronto Pearson Airport at 5:30 pm en route to Beirut via Frankfurt. It was one of the coldest days this year in TO. I didn't have any feelings really, even when I tried to think hard and reflect, nothing... maybe because I was exhausted and stressed for the past two months that my mind and body had no room for anything else.Snow over the CN Tower and Toronto with temperature of -21C degreesIt was still dark at 7:00 am when we reached Frankfurt. The stop there was short and sweet.By the way, the plane from Canada wasn't the best, no individual screens, and by the time dinner reached my seat at 39A, I got pasta :( But the availability of scotch whisky made up to the lack of entertainment and food choices ;)From Frankfurt to Beirut, seat 4A, first line in the economy section. We had to wait in the bus that took us from the airport to the plane, some hot shot needed to get in before us peasants. It was raining that day but temperatures much milder than what I left behind 8 hours before. The trip was more fun that the previous one and we were served tasty hot breakfast although the trip was only 3:30 hours. All Lebs in one plane = conversations and fun! We were like kids, knees on the seats and looking to the people in the back to talk and pass the time :)Friday February 29, 2008, around 1:40 pmBeirut, the capital of Lebanon, in a warm sunny 21C degreesHere comes Beirut, everyone was eagerly waiting to see this sight and get HOME. What a sweet feeling of truly belonging to one place, seeing familiar shapes and sceneries. I don't understand it sometimes; maybe I don't even need to.At the airport, no questions asked at the customs, then another control of passports as a quick glance. I waited with a porter for 4 suitcases to show up. Hamdella, they all made it with me. A bit dirty a bit wet but all there.Another control of passports and suitcases now lead me to the "teftish". What do you expect, a lady with 4 suitcases of 32 kilos each, claiming that they're all mine.The "teftish" guy asked if they were all mine. "Yes" I answered, "I'm back to get married and stay here for good". His eyes open wide "For good" with a suspect look. "Yes" I replied with a nice straight teeth smile. "Do you mind if we open a suitcase?" he asked. "Not at all, which would you like to open?" And there goes one suitcase on the table, opened, checked. "Do you have new cloths", "Yes, jhezeh akid", "Any price tags on them?", "Shouldn't be, but maybe a few, I don't know". "Can we open another suitcase?" "Sure"... Same questions for the other suitcase. He reached a makeup case filled and heavy, "what's in this?", "my make up stuff" and I opened and showed him. He reached my new coat which still had a price tag. "I bought this one last week, didn't take the tag off it yet". Then he ordered the porter to help me close the suitcase and said "ma twekhzina". "No problem, God bless you for doing your job." :) I was really happy that my suitcases were opened. My country is safe!Outside, Khalo and Karam were there. I kissed Karam but was too anxious to hug my Khalo. Couldn't hold back my tears! "I am finally home, not leaving you every again!!" Karam came with a lovely bouquet of red roses, and another good looking guy was smiling at me, turned out he's Fadi, Karam's cousin who was holding a bouquet of white flowers from Nohad, Karam's mom, who was in the car outside waiting to pick us up.Beirut is crowded, driving is a chaos, the smell of pollution is very apparent, one could even see it at the horizon; something that needs some getting used to.After a quick stop in Ain el Remmeneh at the Karam's for a quick lunch, we finally made it to Zouk Mikael.HOME AT LAST!
I wanted to write this post in Arabic bass the Arabic keyboard is still on its way to me, somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean.I have been in Lebanon for 21 days so far and it has been an amazing time, especially lately with the Holy week celebrations. Erba3it Yaacoub, Khamiss el Asrar, Ziyarit 7 kneyis, Samd el Erben, Darb el Salib in the village streets, Dafn el Massi7, Sabt el Nour and the church bells at noon then the Midnight Easter Mass, and Easter Sunday, and Easter Monday. 21 years have passed since I last celebrated this Holy occasion in my hometown, the way I know it, the way I love it and the way I missed it?During all these celebrations, I have seen most of my old friends and neighbors. 21 years passed since I have seen most of these people, and in these past few days, every time I smiled at someone and said ?Mar7aba?, seeing their eyes open wide, calling my name ?Clothilde?? or ?Coco??, smiling at me and hugging, was seriously the most amazing feeling in the world. Seeing them again, feeling the honesty in the way they greeted me erased all my years away, all my aches of exile and gave me back the love I was missing in my life... Today I am complete! I am back, as if I have never left!Everything is back to normal, the mountain view from everywhere I look, the sea at the side of the highway just as it should be, the lights of the cities and villages in the hills at night, the snow on the far away mountain tops, the smell of nature, the taste of vegetables and fruits, and most importantly the good people of Lebanon. How did I survive without all that for so long?How can one stand to be so far away from all these blessings? Did I mention the weather? The way it warms up to the sun, the blooming trees, the wild flowers filling the fields, the calm sea, the sun rising from behind the mountains and sleeping in the sea, the sound of the birds, the church bells and the prayers in the mosques? Even the honking passing cars, the neighbors calling each others from one house to the other as if there?s no one else between them, the kids playing and shouting in the streets? It?s all part of normal Lebanon. Lebanon is normal, Lebanon is beautiful just the way it is, Lebanon is my country, Lebanon is where I belong.Today, March 21st, spring started with its sun hugging us with its warmth and comfort. Today I am blooming with the wild flowers in the fields. Today I am complete?
From Saturday May 3rd 2008, 9:00 a.m. until now, it has only been a blessing after another! All the heartaches and obstacles of the days before were all gone the minute I woke up on that morning, and hopefully it will only be bright skies from now on.I still giggle sometimes when someone calls me ?Madame? and even more ?Madame Karam? but I love it. Karam is a wonderful man and I am very lucky. Lebanon is a great place to be and I am thankful to Our Lady of Lebanon and to God for it all!
I can tolerate power outages, lack of water, not having a decent Internet connection, gas and food prices going up, even clashes and explosions if this should happen again GOD FORBID! I can live with crazy stupid drivers on the roads, and people who take advantage of my ignorance of the "Lebanese way", thieves and liars. I will eventually get used to all the plastic and fake people, the nannies playing with the babies while mommies are home doing absolutely nothing more important. But there's one thing that I cannot accept, will not get used to and will never tolerate.Most of you who live in Lebanon have surely been on the busy streets of Beirut and its suburbs and been approached by kids who want to sell stuff or simply beg for some loose change. Little kids of 6 years and up (I pray they are not any younger even). It really breaks my heart to see these little people with dark like dirt faces coming to the cars' windows and sticking themselves there trying to get money. This is simply NOT HUMAN, no matter where they come from and who they are.These kids are innocent. I tried once to ask a kid to put a hat so the sun won't hit him, I don't think he understood what I was talking about, as if programmed to say certain sentences only or taught the ways of begging/selling and nothing else. Last week I offered a kid beggar a candy instead, he was no taller than the window of the car. How I wished if I could just hold him, hug him and take him to a safe and happy place.Why are these kids on the streets? Why isn't anyone taking care of them? Where are the children's organizations and why aren't they doing something to spare these kids from the animals who are stealing their innocence and their childhood from them? What will become of these children when they become men and women of the world? Will they ever grow up to be any better? Will they know how to have friends, how to laugh, how to love and be happy?Kids are supposed to be at home, cleaned up, well fed, educated and they are supposed to play, smile, and enjoy their childhood, not begging for money and put in the danger of busy streets. Something should be done about that, it is seriously very disturbing, to the point that it can be a good deed to steal these kids and take them home!!!
I've been here for 4 months that felt more like 4 years with all that happened in this very short period of time. From moving back home, to preparing my wedding and all the roadblocks and the stress involved in such a task, to getting the house ready for the arrival of my parents and the family visiting from North America. Add to those 2 funerals of people I know and love right before the wedding, which changed a few aspects of the wedding including the bride?s house and the maid of honor. Then our wedding came along and it was a beautiful day - Thanks to God. The honeymoon was caught short due to the troubles that broke out in different areas of the country. Thankfully the airport closure didn?t affect us much. And then came 3 more death of people I know in my hometown after the wedding, 2 major accidents of the neighbors - he heavily burnt his hand and slightly his face with electricity, and she broke her arms and ribs on an ATV ride that went wrong. On a brighter side, we bought a new car, and I found a job in my field, starting tomorrow...I have never thought that life can be so unpredictable, precious, happy, bittersweet, sad, lucky, unlucky, and challenging all at once and is such a short time. If there is a word that describes best my feelings, it?soverwhelming!But all in all, I am loving life in Lebanon. Every day brings a new surprise. Along with its power outages, its lack of water, its political chaos, its people?s crazy behavior - especially on the roads, and its economical problems, faith still exists in all religions and all people even the ones that don?t know it, we're having more Lebanese Saints, Our Lady has always Her Hands and Her Heart open for us at any given day, neighbors genuinely care and they are there for you when you need them most, the sun still shines every day, the birds sing every morning, the majestic mountains talk, and the moon is definitely closer here. 7amdella.
Man in Hamra straddling two laddersI found Beirut much as I left it six months ago?stagnant and uneasy. At night, the army anddarak(police in gray camouflage uniforms) patrol Beirut?s abandoned streets; tanks sit idly stationed at every big intersection. R. complains that ?since the end of the Nahr el Bared campaign? the army soldiers have started to behave obnoxiously. ?It?s gotten to their heads?all the praise. Now they?re behavior is indistinguishable from thedarak.? On our third night in Beirut, a soldier menacingly trailed us through the streets as we walked home-- just a foot or so behind us, not a taxi in sight.Billboards and advertisements tailored to the current woes of the Lebanese line the highway from the airport to Beirut: for the many citizens dependent on remittances from abroad--Western Union pledges to ?Send Peace? with your money order. The city?s billboard-scape also boasts USAID?s newest PR campaign??A gift from the American people to the Lebanese?, as well as a few new entries to the martyr hall of fame. Regal portraits of Army Commander General Michel Suleiman, the unlucky president elect, have been erected under the banner ?Our Savior.? Rafiq Hariri has been dead for 1000-and-God-knows how many days, according to the gigantic counter at the entrance to Hamra; my friends joke that they want to erect an additional counter to track how many times the presidential elections have been postponed. Is it 11 or 12 now?Prices for every day things have gone up; an Almaza beer will cost you 1250 LL, a manaeesh jubneh up to 2000LL, a one bedroom apartment in Rmeil or Jeitawe $400. Narcotic- and alcohol abuse is rampant; on Sunday afternoon the little bars in Gemayze are packed. "I drink because it makes me calm," S. says. "For twenty-five years, I lived in a bomb shelter. Now I'm free and I drink to forget those twenty-five years."On Tuesday, then, a series of violent incidents down south?a car bomb targeted a UNIFIL vehicle wounding two Irish peacekeepers--hardly upset the routine of most Beirutis. People were preoccupied with the possibility of a surprise visit by George W. Bush. R. called. "Do you know if he's coming or not?" she asked. "How come the shit hits the fan as soon as you arrive in town?" Hezbollah threatened to bus in hundreds of thousands of protesters in the eventuality of a presidential visit, to put him under a "tight siege" but prevent any "assault" against him by Al Qaeda or the likes.I am writing all this from a café-bar where the house specialty advertised on the menu is a ?Sex with the Bartender? cocktail. More soon.
